Anyway, I have a little bit of time to myself today, A luxury I don't seem to have much of lately because I've been so caught up with work and my personal life. So I decided that today, I'm going to write.
I've been taking time away from social media whenever I feel the need to be with myself, keep myself centred. I never realised how helpful it would be to keep my personal life private. And taking time away to focus on my mental health. I used to be such an open book, I never felt the need to hide anything from anyone. It's not that I enjoy oversharing, it's just that I never felt like it was a problem.
But truthfully, it is. And I had to learn the hard way.
I know that people have been noticing that I'm not myself lately, and it's been that way for a while. To the ones who never asked and just flowed with the change, thank you. To those who felt that they had the right to know, well, I don't blame you. I've shared everything with everyone for so many years, personal details of my life felt like public news. But I still am so surprised how people, strangers especially, are so invested in my life.
All in all, I just want to say that whatever happens in my life, I am only interested in looking forward.
There's so much in my life that I haven't quite figured out. So many changes that I'm still learning to accept. So much of my past that I'm still learning how to let go of. Things have changed so drastically, so many things in my life have taken a different course and I just have to find the good in everything. It is what it is, sometimes.
A wise man shared these meaningful words with me a few days ago, he said:
"Make no apologies for working for what you want, even if you realise it was wrong on hindsight. You have the right to go for what you want. You have the right to make mistakes. Although it's proving to be a painful and possibly, regretful process, you have the right to learn from it.
Never think you are a piece of shit for believing in something noble and making mistakes, OK?"
I want to leave these words here as a reminder to myself that I'm doing the best I can for the sake of my own happiness. I am a prideful woman, you'll never see me fall apart. But it doesn't mean that I don't. But it also doesn't mean that I should put my woes on display. My happiness is my responsibility. And this blog post is a reminder to myself to always rise above all the negativity.
We'll get there someday.
Love,
Ashhy
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